Michael Garrad's View

So you enjoy a cigarette - you know it can cause cancer.
You like a glass of amber with your smoke - well, now we know, according to the latest research, any kind of alcoholic drink can also cause cancer.

So that’s that then - no more convivials.

Hey, you like processed foods. Forget it! Bad for the digestive system. Well, dairy products - yum! No, just think of your cholesterol. Chicken, red meat - is it hormone-free? Grain-fed or not? Okay, what about some fish - nope, it can contain toxic levels of mercury, which is very bad for you.

How about bread, the staple diet? After all, Jesus broke bread, didn’t He? (And served a wine, too!) Sorry, too much of a good thing is unwise - all that salt, for a start!

Takeaways? We all know about fast foods. Definitely a no-no - saturated fats etc etc and eventually obesity and high risk of bowl cancer.

So where does that leave us? Fresh vegetables? Well...not quite! Mass-produced, they could contain elements of chemicals used in spraying. Ingest that lot and death waits around the next cabbage patch!

What’s left? Coffee? No, caffeine headaches. Tea? No, too much tannic acid. There’s water but, depending on your point of view, it contains dangerously high amounts of fluoride.

I think I might live on multi-vitamins! But then...